Friday, August 31, 2012

Ting Ting: Lost her life for three

It was supposed to be a joyous day.

I already had a headline for a new blog post and a Facebook status update in my head.

We knew Ting Ting would give birth earlier today.

Well she did.  To three beautiful puppies.

But she died instead.

When I reached her nest, she was soaked in blood and very much lifeless.

My dad was shocked as he just saw her breathing hard a few minutes ago.  She was still warm when I stroked her.

That's the third one this year.  And there's only so much I can take.

But what broke our hearts the most is her orphaned newborns.  They were sucking on their dead mother.

And when we took her away to be buried, they were hungry and cold, squirming here and there, crying and looking for their mom.

There's little chance for them to make it without their mom's milk and care.

Hence, we made a pact to make sure they make it, whether if it's only going to be for a day, a week, a month, or another 10 years.

We moved the pups to a new nest next to my room, so we can attend to them all the time.

We kept a warm bottle nearby so that they still can get warmth, minus the fur and tender loving care of a mother.  They would try to suck on it, thinking it's mom.

And as you can see, we have another one that looks like her first pup, Wan Wan and Ting Ting herself.

For now, we call him Wan Wan Number 2.

Now that Ting Ting is gone, we have to assume her role as mother.

And that means feeding them round the clock.

And making them poo and pee.  Yes, they can't go on their own for the first one to two weeks without the mother licking their genitals and butts.

I foresee a chaotic two weeks, plus the fear of losing them any time now.  It's going to be a lot of hardwork, but we're doing this for Ting Ting.  If she had to die to give life for these three pups, then we're gonna be damn sure to make that happen.

We ruled out her death was caused by excessive bleeding, probably from uterine rupture or early placental placement.  Well, that's what Google tells me anyway.  In her last whelping, her puppies didn't make it.  We did think of spaying her afterwards, but then we thought that maybe we should give her another try before spaying her for real.  Alas, when her puppies did make it, she herself couldn't.

She was still pregnant with another puppy when we buried her, so we'd like to think that in all our sorrow of losing one of our smartest, least problematic dog, we were still blessed to have three more, and so far they have survived for almost 12 hours and hopefully, counting.

Losing a dog makes me think of not getting any more dogs, 'coz they're just going to die earlier than you and take a piece of you away. :(

Rest in peace, Ting.  We'll take good care of your pups.  And we promise to bathe Wan Wan more often.

Monday, August 27, 2012

School Crap: Let's Talk About Sex?

For those who keep saying that being a teacher is easy, fuck you.

You don't have to deal with sexually active, baby-aborting, pregnant teenage pub girls.

Yeah, that's what I thought.

Which now begs the question, what is the role of the class teacher here?

One, do we confront and advice them? In which they'd definitely don't give a shit 'coz sex is awesome, abortion is not murder and working at a pub brings in a lot of dough.

Two, do we tell the higher authorities and parents? In which was done a gazillion times, and motivational camps ain't gonna cut it.

Or three, do we just ignore the issue? As they are pretty incorrigible.  Plus, their parents probably don't give a shit either, so why should we?

I'd like to do option 3 so bad it hurts, but I know there'd be foetus blood on my hands should anything happen.  Yeah, the years of conditioning towards being a role model when studying in a teacher training college actually worked, those mind game playing bastards.

Some advised that I do option number 2.  But then again, I feel like it would amount to nothing.  They'd probably just tell me to let their parents handle them.  And look where their kids at.  Not passing any judgment though.

Then there's option numero uno.  Ugh, do I have to? I'm too young to be a mom and talk about the birds and the bees.  It's not like they're gonna stop humping anyway.  Unless I show them grotesque videos of abortions and pictures of rotting vaginas.  Hm, now that's a thought to consider.

Oh yeah, being a teacher is a damn breeze.

So, what would you do?

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Parenting Fail of the Day: Teacher cuts pupil's hair, mum files police report

While doing unproductive things on Facebook today, I stumbled upon a link which outraged the teacher inside me:

Quit squinting your eyes, just click here.
There are so many wrongs in this report that I just can't let a day go by before running my mouth about it.

I am a teacher and I take offence on behalf on the 'reported' teacher.  Bad Hair Cut Kid Momma might just "lodge a report" (I'm air-quoting it) for defaming her, but hey, she and other dumb parents need to get a reality check.  

"The mother, Madam Serene Ong, is outraged that the teacher did this just before a crucial exam, that it was done without her knowledge - and that it ruined the boy's $60 haircut."

What I'm totally reading here is that she is more concerned on wasting $60 on an impermissible haircut.

  "She claimed the teacher - Ms Belinda Cheng of Unity Primary - also threatened to deduct marks from the boy's exam if he refused to have his hair cut."

Hell I'd do that too! What if the kid decides to appear for an exam wearing a $200 skinny hipster jeans that was bought by his momma?  Should he be allowed to take the test?  I can already imagine the headline - "Pupil in hipster jeans denied exam, mum files police report."

"But, she said, Primary 6 pupils had been warned before about sporting long hair, and Ms Cheng had the right intentions.  The teacher cut the boys' hair as she wanted them to look neat," said Mrs Gill.

THE KID HAD BEEN WARNED.  THE KID HAD BEEN FUCKING WARNED. DAFUQ IS WRONG WITH PARENTS THESE DAYS? And you see, teachers are the one who gives a fuck on the appearance of their students.

"But Madam Ong said the teacher apologised to her and the three pupils yesterday."

Okay, so from now on, I will apologise to all the kids I demerit and punished for their wrongdoings because that's the way it should be.  Teachers should feel sorry for trying to educate kids and instill values in them.  Right, parents? RIGHT?

"He was crying, and told her that Ms Cheng, who is one of his form teachers, had cut his fringe and sideburns."

Well colour me surprise! I'm thinking of a word that rhymes with 'rat'.

"The teacher had no right to cut his hair," said Madam Ong."

Yeah, and the kid had EVERY right to go to school with long sideburns and fringes.  He has every right to break the school rules, no?

"She showed me no respect by not telling me that she was going to cut his hair beforehand," she said.  "Worse, she threatened to deduct his oral marks if he didn't agree to let her cut his hair.  It was an hour before his PSLE oral exam.  What if it had affected his performance?"

Well, what was Ms Cheng supposed to do?  Call her and say, "Hey, your kid badly needs a haircut, you think you can bring him to the hairdresser? By the way, his test starts an hour from now."  "What if it had affected his performance?" GOD. People just do not know about the consequences of their actions, do they? I need to suggest this to the Ministry of Education to create a new subject in school named Education of Action Consequences.

"She said she was so upset she made a police report and complained to the Ministry of Education that night."

For what crime?  Ugh, drama queen much?

"She said Ryan did not dare to step out of the house for two days "because he thought he looked funny."

Guess Momma didn't tell him that nobody gives a fuck 'coz he's only 12.

"Ms Cheng, she added, had also wasted the $60 she had spent on Ryan's hair just five days before the incident.  He has been going to a hairstylist at Reds Hairdressing for several years.  Madam Ong spent another $60 getting his hair restyled on Saturday."

Again, money seems to be the main problem here.  And hey, clever advertising there - hoping for a sponsor, maybe?

"She said the ministry told her to "forgive the teacher" and the police said she could seek legal advice."

NO! How can she ever forgive the teacher?! It's a $60 hair cut for crissake!  And it was a smart move for the cops, passing the dumb problem to someone else.

"Several principals contacted said the students sporting unkempt hair is a common problem they face.  But they felt Ms Cheng's approach of just chopping it off was outdated.  Doing this is like going back hundreds of years."

Ever wonder why kids these days are way horrible than before? We who were brought up under the 'outdated' iron fist regime turn out to be just fine.  But I guess this logic fails them.

Dear overprotective parents, please your brain sometimes.  Schools have rules and your kids are subject to the rules.  They break it, they face the consequences.  Unless your kids went blind or crippled because of batshit crazy teachers, then yes, you can lodge a report and sue their asses off.  I will even start an online petition for you to get those teachers sacked and the school demolished.  But if you and your kid can't follow the rules, by all means, homeschool them.  Don't blame the institution and the teachers who WANT to educate your kid.

So, any Bad Hair Cut Kid Momma supporters here?  Let me know why she's not crazy to lodge a police report, 'coz I just can't brain this.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

The Greatest Love After Your Parents...Are From Your Dogs


I know I'm getting imaginary high-fives now from all dog lovers, and well, I'm sure cat owners get as much love from their feline friends.  BUT DOGS JUST RULE MORE! Hah, I just had to say that.  Sorry cat lovers.

Besides being fiercely loyal, dogs will just love you forever, whether you're rich or poor, and regardless of who you are.  They will always think that you are the best person in the world, even though you are just plain horrible to humans.

Everyday, I'm inundated by affection from my dogs.  Their eyes just lit up every time they see me.  Heck, even my loved ones' eyes don't lit up when they see me.  Puny humans.  But my babies? All the time.

And with 10 dogs, I'm not so sure if you can imagine how it'd be when they decide to show their love ALTOGETHER at once.

When they were cute little munchkins, they were just fucking adorable with their little kisses.


I think I smelled like a dog for about a week after the little TLC incident.  But just like that, all stress and worries were gone.  Such are the mighty powers of canines.

So if you're feeling a little blue and lonely and loveless, get a dog.  They will worship the ground you walk.  After they poop and pee all over it though.  But of course, you gotta love them back.  They will love you more anyway.

More adorable photos before this shot here!

On a side note by the way, if you follow my blog closely you'd know that I have 11 dogs, but I mentioned 10 earlier.  I'm sad to announce that one of them got hit by a car recently, just like little Gabby.

He was my dad's favourite, and Toby's brother/partner in crime.

Rest in peace, Cody.

Now there'll be two wagging tails waiting for me at St. Peter's gate.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

5 Perks of Being A Teacher Even Though You Hate It

Okay, I never said I hate being a teacher, but I do know that I complain a lot.  Because seriously, there are just so many things to complain about being a teacher, one would think I fucking hate my job.

And that sometimes I forget to smell the roses while stepping on its thorns.  

Cheesy metaphor aside, I've been told countless times on how lucky I am to be a teacher.  When they lay out all the benefits at me, I feel like strangling them.  They just have no idea.  

I admit there are benefits, but since being a teacher is a hard-ass job, I'd rather call them 'consolations'.

But since I'm in such a good mood today (in which I'm sure all teachers in Malaysia know why), I'm ready to  commit to the fact that yes, being a teacher does have its perks! 

Here are the 5 Perks of Being A Teacher Even Though You Hate It which will make you non-teachers jello and hate me more, and for teachers to count their blessings when they have a retarded day:

1. Long holidays

We're off on weekends, so that means we can party on Friday nights, and we have two mid-term one-week long hols, one two-week long break in May, and a one-and-a-half-month long holidays at the end of the year.  That should be the only reason to suck all crappy things up.

2. 6-hour working time

We work on average 6 hours per day.  That means we can sleep in during the second or first half of the day.   Super sweet.

3. Side income opportunities

With that being said, if we choose not to be a Snorlax, we can generate extra income by giving tuitions, writing other people's thesis or strip teasing.  Not that I know anyone doing the last one.  But just basically anything.  Being in school too allows us to have a network with our colleagues.  Therefore promoting Thailand Milk Barley Rice Whatever Shit Beauty Miracle bar soaps would be so much easier, and multi-level marketing ripping-off scheme would work well on desperate-for-wealth-fast individuals.

4.  Variety

Being a teacher is everything but mundane.  The levels of self-fulfilment (when the objectives of our lessons are achieved) are different everyday, and so are the horrific battles.  We face hundreds of different individuals everyday, with different needs, motivations, problems and a bunch of other crap.  We don't necessarily stay in school forever; we're bound to be assigned "outstation" jobs outside of school.  Beats working in a cubicle a hundred times.

5. Mating material

Once a upon a time, people look down on teachers because they are paid so badly and just the thought of marrying one makes one cringes.  However, today, we become highly sought after due to Point 1, 2 and 3.  We can spend more time with our family, but mostly 'coz we can make a fucking sandwich for male chauvinists who marry us, all the time.  And wives of teachers can always keep an eye on them. And I mean ALWAYS.  So, being a teacher does make one a little hotter as a marrying material.

But of course, I can counter all the perks I mentioned above because I can be very pessimistic sometimes, but since today is a great day for all teachers, I shall let that pass.

Why is it a great day today?  Because we only work for 3 days this week as the Raya holidays loom.  More reasons to celebrate!

Now that I have successfully make you wanna strangle me, I'd like to wish all Muslim friends and readers a happy Raya celebration, and to all teachers, a happy fucking holiday :D

P/s: Am I missing any perks here? Add on!

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Nur Feetri: Is the world bullying her or doing her a favour?

First of all, I apologise for the lack of post updates ('coz I think you'd really care).  A huge tree fell on our phone line causing us to be Internet-free for five fucking days.  Oh the painful, silent, void!  But we're back on now, hallelujah.

Being cut off from the world wide web for five excruciating days, I've missed out on a lot of awesome new videos, memes and parodies.

And speaking of parodies, a young girl, Nur Feetri has gone mad viral due to a video of her whining about her sore eyes while making weird facial expressions.

If you've been living in a cave, or a tree has fallen on your phone line too, then this is what you have missed:

Have you doused your eyes with cyanide and microwaved your brain to remove the image that you just watched? Good.  Let's move on.

Now, when the Internet approves of a video, which is always because it is really, really good, or really, really bad, it will go viral.  The citizens of the net unite for a cause, whether to express awe or distaste.

And when a video gets viral, you have parodies. 

Now, while half of the world is making fun of this girl, there are law-abiding, holier-than-thou people who defend the action of this girl.  I can't fathom why on earth would you condone the act of this girl with facial spasm, but some say that what we're doing is called cyber-bullying.

Or is it?

Is the world a big bully of self-expression or just doing her a favour to stop her from monkeying around? (yes, pun intended).

First of all, kids should know that the Internet can be the best place on earth, or it can be hell on earth.

It depends on what you do with it.  If they don't know this, parents should educate them on the pros and cons of the Internet, before allowing their kids to post photos of their under-developed boobs or dumb whiny videos.

Secondly, kids and basically everyone should be responsible for their actions, and be prepared to face any consequences from their actions.  This is what I always tell my kids.  That whatever they do, no matter how tiny it is, will have its effect, if not now, someday.

Thus, this girl should be prepared to face the consequences of her actions.  If she expected 1000 'likes' for her cutesy literally eye-soring video, than she should be prepared to face her eye-sored tormentors.

I don't condone the death threats thrown at her, but I do think she should know that the world doesn't revolve around her, and this can be a great lesson for her to be very careful on what she posts on the Internet next time.  She is a very young girl, and how would you feel as a parent if you see your kid posts dumb video of themselves, when you know that netizens can be really mean and that what you post online can never be unposted.  I would've banned my kid from using the Internet until she turns 40. 

Therefore, all the torments, the parodies and the memes rained on this very unfortunate and naive girl should serve as a valuable lesson for her and every expressive tween and teen out there who aren't aware of the consequences of posting stuff on the Internet.

I'm all about freedom of expression, but freedom has a price - there are lots of mean people who want to get you, so you better be strong enough to defend your expression.

But one thing's for sure - The Internet has spoken.  She has unintentionally attained one of the greatest achievement to obtain in the Internet.

She became a meme. 

So, what's your say?